Want to know the secret to getting exactly what you want in life? Ask for it.
The job you want, the opportunities you think are only for others, the date with the cutie, the part in the play…Ask for it.
I don’t mean ask for permission to do it, I mean put your hat in the ring, put yourself forwards, be present and available.
You can sit by in life and fester over the things other people have, something especially acute in this wonderful world of digital sharing. It’s easy to see an Instagram snap, tweet or blog post about a place you’d love to go, a product you’d love to use, a life you’d like to have. But there is more to that image that the image, there’s time, skill and hard work gone into it. Remember that.
I can tell you 100% that the way those people got, went, experienced those things is because they put themselves out there.
Maybe they saved up and went without little luxuries on a day to day basis just so they could go on that incredible trip.
Maybe they bust a gut on their blog for 5 years with hardly two opportunities to rub together and then finally they were noticed and now that hard work has allowed them to work with huge brands and campaigns.
If you want to work with a brand, ask them. Work for it, search for the PR email and get in touch, explain why you’d like to work with them, what you could offer, what they can expect from working with you. Then prepare yourself for the simple fact you might get a no, but you have as much of a chance of getting that elusive ‘yes’ that you want.
The chances reset every time, the more times you get a no has no impact on what the next answer will be.
If you want to work for a particular company, find out their personal email, or the bosses email and just as with brands tell them why you want to work for them, what you can bring to the table. Ask to meet for a coffee, do your research on the company, listen to them, use any expertise they share with you to better yourself and your career.
So many of the things that I am most proud of in my life and career came about because I decided I wanted something and went out and grabbed with both hands, not the things that landed in my lap.
I work every day on this blog knowing that I love it, and if something fantastic comes from it that’s a bonus, but if I WANT something then I email the brand, I engage with the PR’s, I’m great to work with, respond to emails and get involved. I am present. I ask for it.
Here are some tips to help you ask for it…
Be Clear. Be specific, it’s key when voicing a request, be it at work for that promotion or pay rise, for a blog opportunity or life in general.
Instead of saying something like, “I want to work with you” make sure your request is completely clear, like this one: “I’m a fan of your brand, I have a blog with XXX views per month and focus on XXXX which would fit perfectly with your brand. I would love to discuss ways in which we could collaborate”.
Lay your cards on the table, tell them what you want, what they will get, how you would like to work with them and why it’s a good fit. If you lay all the details out on the table, you’re more likely to get the answer you’re looking for.
Remember Your Value. If you don’t truly believe that you deserve to work with that brand or move up in your team at work, no one else will.
Remind yourself of all of your accomplishments, and run through a list of all of your positive assets. A little confidence boost can change the tone of any conversation in work, life or love! Think about what you’re asking for, and go over all of the reasons why you deserve it. And if you need a little extra help in this department, you can always jot down a list, so you can easily remind yourself if you start to waver.
Write it Down. When gearing up for a conversation that might be a challenge, preparation is key. I’ll write down or type out my thoughts—nothing fancy, just bullet points. Remember that old saying “you can never be too prepared” it’s so true in this instance. So write it down, read it over, and even run it past someone who’s opinion you value, someone who works in the same industry, another blogger you value who has worked with the brand you’re reaching out to.
Be Gracious. This one is super important. Being gracious and asking for what you want in a calm, confident, and positive manner can be the difference between yes and no. Most of the time, it’s not necessarily what you say, but how you say it, think about great customer service, it more than likely great because of the way you were spoken to rather than the words used.
Embrace The No. This might be the most important piece of advice that I have learnt. ‘No’ does not determine your value, nor should you let it veer you off your desired path. No doesn’t mean you should give up, or that you don’t deserve what you asked for. You will get where you want, eventually.
So now all you have to do it go and ask for it, whatever your it is, ask for it.